grace

What People Are Saying About…

What People Are Saying About…

Labels

Earlier this week, in Labels: The Self Killer, Kewan and Bikurgurl illustrated the dangers of labels and how we need to choose the ones we accept. Now it’s time to hear your views on labels, which ones you accept and which you reject and how you deal with them. Let the conversation begin!

“I have had negative labels attached to me all my life. I am just now at 57 years of age learning to cast them off and finally set myself free. It is, in part through my writing that I do this.”

— Carol from WritersDream9

“I try to break labels (except my labels: daughter, sister, friend and girlfriend and blogger!). I can say I am somehow blessed to be around good people who have accepted me. I was never ‘out’. And I see that as a blessing, indeed.❤
On the other hand, I think […] a negative label… was given to me by my rich aunt. We are labelled poor. Well.. we are indeed poor. And that is always felt during family gatherings. We are the servers. We don’t seat in table where the ‘rich’ aunts and uncles eat. We, my family, is an outcast. But by the grace of God, that label will be changing soon.❤”

— Rosema from Rosemawrites

I too have a huge list of labels pasted upon me, don’t give a hoot to most, keep a few because I like them stuck on me.

— Sharmishtha Basu from Agnishatdal The Ezine

“I simply press the delete button for labels that do not apply to me. Let’s give ourselves grace and space!”

— Kewan from Kewrites

“I think we choose what labels fit us and which don’t. Even if we don’t like the label, we can choose to be defined by them or say, no this isn’t me, I don’t like it. This is what I am, not this. It may not stop others from labeling but at least in your heart and among friends, you truly know who you are and are not.
For instance, since I suffer from depression no as a result severe fatigue, [one] label I never like is disabled. Though in some documents, to get money etc to live on etc. I may need to be defined this way, in life I never think of myself this way, and I hope others don’t too. I just say sometimes, it is harder for me to do things and It takes me a bit longer in some situations. But I’m no worse of than anyone else, I have learned so much having to try harder. What we have trouble with or cannot do, does not define us.”

— Amanda from Mandibelle16

Vulnerability

In the Twitterverse, the conversation changed from labels to vulnerability which brings up an important point. If we accept labels that other people apply to us it makes us vulnerable to their influence. That’s not the kind of vulnerability that we spoke with Rosema about in Grace Gets Personal: Acceptance through Vulnerability.

So Bikurgurl jumped into the conversation in twitter to set the record straight:

How do you feel about vulnerability?

22 thoughts on “What People Are Saying About…”

  4. I am learning that vulnerability should be a choice. For me, it all has to do with boundaries, which I am trying to create healthy ones right now in my life. My boundaries have gates which I can open and allow others that I have chosen to see my inner heart. I am trying to look at it as a gift that I can choose to give instead of the two extremes of walling myself off or having an open door to everyone. I agree that in our writing we open ourselves deeply and that is very healing. It sure is a balancing act and a choice. We are being vulnerable in this conversation and it feels very healthy to me!

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    1. Yes this conversation is healthy. It’s wonderful to read your personal take on vulnerability. I like the metaphors you couch it in and you bring up an important point–we have to set our boundaries. May I quote you?

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  5. I believe that we should be very, very cautious about exposing our weak points vulnerabilities, there is a proverb that when a friend becomes an enemy he is the worst enemy you can have. Life has taught me not to expose them much! When it comes to sharing with friends love and warmth are better than vulnerabilities I guess.

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    1. Thank you Sharmistha! Your view is important and I am so glad you chose to share it. You bring up some interesting points I would like to address in a follow-up post, if I may quote you?

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  6. Vulnerability can be intense. Truly, sharing information, emotion, or a part of yourself with other people. As a writer, this is much easier to do with written words, than face to face. Most writers I believe, can attest, it is easier to be vulnerable and have your written words flow out than a vocal conversation. But there are cases to let a person understand us better and to let another person know we can empathize with them, vulnerability is necessary. For instance, in relationships we are constantly weighing the ups and downs of telling our partner or date, certain details. We make ourselves open to each other but there is a time, a place, and a pace to do things at.

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  7. I don’t know if i can jump into this conversation, but if i could give my view, then I’d agree with Amanda and say:
    Vulnerability is making yourself open to the ones who you know would accept you with your scars, flaws, and those labels. It’s giving that part of you to someone who you know could hurt you but you trust that person enough not to.
    Do i make sense?

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    1. Yes you make perfect sense. Thank you so much for adding to our discussion. New perspectives are always appreciated! may I quote you in a follow up post? If you know anyone else who’d like to participate, send them over. This series is open-ended and accepts all views 🙂 Hopefully it will shine a light into someone’s dark corner or if not, it may remind us all to take a moment to give ourselves some space and be more understanding of our human failings. Thank you again.

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