Hi! I’m back. This is Ran, and I am taking back the newsletter. Last week, my scribe, Melinda, took over, but I got it back. I am Sarn’s son from the Curse Breaker Series, and yes, that means I’m a fictional character. I mention that because it explains a lot and my scribe should have gotten help from nonfictional people instead of trying to do it all herself.
What happened?
My scribe needed to replace her bed, not the mattress, but the thing it sits on. She went online and picked one that had storage since she has a small apartment and more storage is better. (But was it really? We shall see.)
The new bed frame thing last week in a big box covered in stickers claiming it weighted more than 70 lbs! I pointed that out to my scribe since she can’t lift more than 20lbs. I only know that because I once convinced her to put the bags of groceries she carried from the store on a scale.
I’m fictional, so I can’t lift anything. I recommended she ask a neighbor for help but my scribe didn’t. Since the nice delivery guy carried the box down the steps to the area outside my scribe’s apartment, she could push it inside her apartment without straining anything.
The Mystery Box
The box leaned against a table since my scribe had to go to the office on Wednesday. I know what you’re wondering. Did I touch the box?
Of course I did! But I just pushed on it to make sure it wouldn’t fall over when my scribe returned since it was right in the entrance to her apartment. The box was taller and wider than my scribe, and I needed to make sure it wouldn’t flatten her when she flung the door open that evening. (It didn’t. No scribes were flattened.)
But another box that was bigger and heavier than the first one arrived that day!
What was in this second box?
I didn’t find out that day. My scribe manhandled it into her apartment and then she needed to move around her existing furniture to make room to build the bed. All that moving exposed dust, so Melinda had to clean it. I ran through the portal to escape the dust. Inari keeps her apartment dust-free.
When I returned the next morning (Thursday), the boxes were still sealed. Melinda had to work from home and record a podcast, so she didn’t open the boxes until 8 pm. I got bored and left since she wasn’t writing about me or doing anything interesting.
(I’ll tell you more on the podcast episodes later in this email. I promise!)
Unboxing A Nightmare
Melinda finally opened the boxes and found all the pieces needed to build the new bed frame with storage. There were more than two hundred pieces if I count the screws. She set to work on it.
I found a comfy spot far from the construction zone and munched on a healthy brownie that was not sweet but very chocolatey. I still wish it was a cookie. But my scribe is on a health kick, so there are no cookies in her apartment. 🙁 I almost returned to Inari’s apartment to get a cookie because she always has some for me.
Melinda worked until 1 am and got the frame built. But there were still over a hundred pieces to go. So she went to bed and I went back to Inari’s apartment to check on my family. Since Melinda didn’t start writing Curse Breaker Unleashed yet, they weren’t doing anything.
I returned the next morning (Friday) to find my scribe sitting on the flooring staring in horror at two pieces. They were connected by two thin wooden dowels but both dowels snapped when she followed the instructions and flipped them over.
I told her to get help from someone qualified since the instructions didn’t say what those wood pieces were for. They could be structural for all we knew.
Saved by the Handyman
So Melinda went online and found a handyman who specializes in building furniture. Best of all, he could come that afternoon!
The handyman came and he used pliers to remove the broken pieces of the dowel from all 4 holes and then he whittled two new dowels! They were the exact size needed so the two wood pieces went together seamlessly as intended.
It took him 5 hours to assemble the rest of the bed since it had shelves, drawers and a slide out little shelving unit/nightstand, and he had to use an allen key to tighten the screws, one at a time by hand. Once that was done, he helped my scribe move the mattress and boxspring onto the new frame and then helped her carry out the old one.
Melinda is grateful for his help and was glad to pay his fee. So that was the drama last week, now let’s talk books!
Book News
Did Melinda get any writing done last week?
Yes, she did! She wrote the last 4 chapters for Chaos in Chains. So this week, it’ll go to our editor. But our editor is getting eye surgery on Thursday, so we might not get the edits back this week. Melinda tried to finish the book last week, but she also wants to tie up all loose ends so she can just write books for me—I mean books in the Curse Breaker Series—for a while. And there was a lot to tie up.
Since she didn’t post an episode on Friday due to the furniture situation I talked about above, she posted the chapter she would have posted on Friday on Saturday and Saturday’s chapter on Sunday and Sunday’s chapter today on Monday.
So as of today, Chaos in Chains is done and all 52 chapters are posted on Patreon and Substack.
I’ll let you know next week about the edits and what comes next. The launch is now imminent! As soon as the books are ready to go to print, we can launch it.
New Podcast Episodes
As I mentioned above, Melinda recorded new episodes for the podcast! She put a call out on Threads and a lot of fantasy authors volunteered as tribute—I mean they signed up to come on the podcast. So here as the three Melinda recorded this week:
All the authors were so fun to talk to and they have some really interesting books and the stories behind them are kind of wild. I hope you enjoy listening to them.
Since email providers don’t like a lot of links, here are the general links to our podcast, where you can find all 3 episodes:
These are the latest episodes as of this newsletter. Melinda is scheduled to record 3 more podcasts this week. We’ll tell you about them next week. Until then, read a good book!